Tuesday, May 13, 2014

A little proud mom advice

I recently had a proud mom moment. And as a single mom, I need to celebrate those proud moments. A long time friend of mine sent me a note telling me what a good kid Justin is and “you dun good!” He has run into my son a few times, this is the second, “you dun good!” note from him. My son is about to turn 22. He’s going to college. He’s growing up. And I really enjoy seeing him turn into a contributing member of society.

That’s a big thing for a mom. It’s hard to raise a child by yourself. Its funny, I was just having this conversation with an amazing single mom. People talk about all of the sacrifices I must have made. And don’t get me wrong, there were many. But every single one was worth it. To see Justin begin to flourish and to see other people enjoy him is the reward.

Here’s a little advice to mom’s everywhere, single or partnered:
  • A spotless house is nice and all, but getting it just clean enough is perfect. You do that and you can go and watch your child’s game, volunteer for a field trip, help them with their homework and plop onto the couch to watch some mindless TV before bed so you can wind down.
  • Don’t back down on your consequences. Set the consequence for your kid’s good behavior and bad behavior, then stick to it, even if it means you lose out on something you really want too. 
  • You may think that you are so busy taking care of your kids, the house, your job that you are missing everything. You’re not! So give yourself a break. It may be a blur at the time, but when you look back, you see just how much you enjoyed the chaos and being there for your kidlets.
  • When your kids are sullen and uncommunicative don’t take it personally. There is absolutely nothing you can do and trying only makes you more frustrated. They will get through it and so will you. 
  • All your hard work is going to make a glorious human adult. Someone others will have to work with, live with, marry, buy from… Even when you think they didn’t learn anything from you while they are the sloths in your own house, when they get on their own, they remember all that dear old mom did for them and they miraculously start taking care of themselves. 
I guess the morale of this post is that it’s great to hear from people that your kids are good kids and “you dun good”. Its also great to remember each and every day that “you are doing good.” The journey may be hard, but boy it’s worth it!

1 comment:

  1. Great job Denise, both on this post, and for being a great mom. (and friend!)

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